Hail anyone but not Satan.

"I'm one helluva liar. Most of my adult life, I've been accused of being a charlatan, a phony, an impostor. I guess that makes me about as close to what the Devil's supposed to be, as anyone. It's true. I lie constantly, incessantly. Because I lie so often, I'd really be full of shit if I didn't keep my mouth shut and my bowels open."

- Anton LaVey

I'm back for another interesting post, literally.. So, I'm gonna talk more about Anton LaVey, the founder of the "Church" of Satan and the author of the Satanic Bible. I'm also gonna talk about Werewolfism. Next time. :D -Excitement- LOL.

Okay, so here's some facts about Anton Stanton LaVey.

1. Legend says that his genuine birth name is Anton Szandor LaVey.

- But actually, his real name is Howard Stanton Levey! :-O

2. He claimed that his parents are Joseph and Augusta LaVey.

- But they were Michael and Gertrude Levey..

3. When the baloney Anton (LOL) was 15, he played the second oboe with the San Francisco Ballet Orchestra, which he's the youngest musician EVER to play in that institution.

- Truth is, there was NO San Francisco Ballet Orchestra during that time, and none of the records showed Levey or LaVey. :-O

4. In 1948, 18 year old Anton played the organ at the Mayan burlesque theater in Los Angeles. He met a young stripper named Marilyn Monroe (Wtf?), which he had a very DEVOTED affair before Marilyn's rise to stardom! According to Anton, Monroe had resorted to stripping to pay her rents. No one believed his relationship with Marilyn, so later he showed visitors a copy of Marilyn's famous nude calendar saying, "Dear Tony, how many times have you seen this! Love, Marilyn". I'm sure you all have heard of this relationship! :-O

- Truth is, he never met Marilyn in his life. Robert Slatzer and Harry Lipton were her so-called lovers. Henry paid Marilyn's expenses includin' her rents. Diane LaVey, Anton's ex-wife, admitted that she faked the "Monroe" word on the calendar. Someone also claimed that Anton admitted to never knowing or even meeting Marilyn. o-o Wow.

5. (On top, Mammy Pleasant! :O) Anton bought a house at 6114 California (Omfg CALIFORNIA D:) Street (which later became the headquarters of the Church of Satan), as he found out that it was a former brothel of Barbary Coast Mdm Mammy Pleasant. The house was full of trapdoors and secret passageways, built by Pleasant to elude police raids.

- Truth is, 6114 was actually his parent's house, and it was NEVER a brothel.. The secret passageways and hidden rooms was also constructed by Anton! :-O

6. Anton's trademark shaved head was a result of a ceremonial head-shaving on April 30 1966, to formalize his role as the High Priest of Satan. This ritual was performed in the tradition of the Yezidi devil-worshipping tribes of Iraq, said to have carried out similar ceremonies.

- Truth is, Anton shaved his head in the summer of 1966 by a light-hearted dare from his wife. The "LaVey look" had nothing to do with the Church of Satan founding or any weird meanings attached to it. Nor do Yezidi qawwals (religious teachers) shave their heads!

7. Anton was the author of the Satanic Bible, his "awesome" work, to fulfill his congregation's need for a scriptural guide.

- NO. The Bible was a commercial vehicle by publisher Avon Books. Avon approached baloney Anton for some kinda Satanic work to blend in with Satanism & witchcraft trend in the 1960s. Pressed for materials of the deadline, Anton then resorted to plagiarism, and claimed the authorship. The bible's "9 Satanic Statements", was from passages of Ayn Rand's "Atlas Shrugged". The last words in the bible "Yankee Rose" have spreaded curiosity for years. I'm curious too! It's actually an old popular tune in Anton's nightclub repertoire.

8. Anton claimed that the "Church" had hundreds of thousands of formal members.

- NO WAY. They never exceeded 300. LMFAO

9. Anton claimed he was a loving man.

- He violently beat his wife Diane throughout their marriage. In 1984 a police report was made saying Diane strangled into unconsciousness. Anton was in such rage that his daughter Karla had to pull him off Diane and drag her outside the house to save her life. Anton also beat and abused his female disciples with whom he had sex, forcing them into prostitution as part of his "Satanic counseling" and collecting their earnings. How despicable can he be? :/ In 1986 Anton was a witness of molestation of his grandson by a friend..

10. On Anton's death certificate, the date of his death was October 31, 1997 (Halloween).

- No. An investigation determined that Anton's actual date of death was October 29, 1997 and that the "Halloween" date had been illegally written on the document by his daughter, Karla. Below are the baloney death certificates! They are pretty interesting. :D

More about Satanism: by Lillee Allee. (Plagiarism :P)

1. A Satanist has a healthy self - that is healthy self esteem and not a falsely inflated ego. This is seen in their approach with others, their own preservationist approaches to life, and willingness to accept responsibility for their actions, reactions and circumstances. When I first met John (iJohnSkate AHAHAHAHAHAHAH), I called him "cocky, egotistical, and power hungry." That about says it all.

2. A Satanist will always ask "Why not?" rather than "Why me?" They already think it is all about them, and they never put themselves in the victim role.

3. A Satanist will rarely ask for advice, and will do anything to not appear desperate or needy.

4. A Satanist often will be willing to kill for their spouse, children and best friends. But will generally be unwilling to die just for someone else's cause. As John said, and has been quoted so many times now "People ask me if I would die for my faith. I would. But I am far more interested in living for it which is much harder." A Satanist takes the philosophy with both hands and grabs without shame.

5. A Satanist will not try to convert you - or try to sell you a laminated card to "make" you a member. Most often he or she will be quite happy being different than you are, and will remind you of this many a time.

6. A Satanist will take on few "students" to help get their lives in shape. You rarely will see a Satanist acting as a sheep or trying to be another Satanist's sheep or personal Jesus.Again, they dont see the need to lead a sheep to a different bible.

7. A Satanist is not one to help just anyone. They will give a homeless man a sandwich rather than a dollar. They will encourage people to learn to love work, rather than shirk responsibility. If they see you as an attention whore, then that is the one thing they wont provide you with.

8. A Satanist is far from the wild sexual animal that people portray. He or she will love sex, but crave to have an equal partner. They will balance the thrill of debauchery with the idea of having someone who is equal to them in a relationship. Many Satanists are in healthy relationships with non-Satanists. Or let me rephrase, Many healthy Satanists are in healthy relationships with themselves and others.

9. A Satanist is active in his community, and successful in his/her career. Handouts, if gotten with cunning, are applauded. If are gotten out of pity, it is something not to publicize.

10. Sometimes the best Satanists are in your face, but many others you would never guess what their faith is, but you will wonder because they are successful on all planes and victorious on all playing fields, depending on the game, of course.

Satanic Wedding Ceremony (Omfg this is interesting! :-O)

This is a chalice! :D

The altar and room is lit by a dozen black candles. One red candle sits on the altar, also incense, bell or gong, one silver chalice, a short sword (or dagger), a crystal ball (or stone), wedding rings and length of cord. A Baphomet plaque hangs on the wall behind the altar on the west wall.

The bride and groom will be dressed/undressed, according to their desires. A Baphomet amulet's worn around the neck. Selections of music shall be decided by both bride/groom and played in the background as bride and assembled guests enter.

The groom stands next to the best man to the right, near the altar. Before the bride and the one who gives her away comes down the isle, there will be the usual procession of bride's maids, ushers, flower girls, etc. The priest stands in front of the altar, facing the congregation. When the ceremony is about to begin, the best man strikes the gong 3 times slowly.

PRIEST: In Nomine Dei Nostri Satanas Luciferi Excelsi! In the name of Satan, I call upon the forces of Darkness and the infernal power within! Consecrate this place with the power, love and light of Lucifer. Join with us, we say in the binding of these two who shall be as one. They desire to make their union a matter of record, so that their friends and the society in which they live may bear witness and lend support.

Diana and Adonis, Ishtar and Tammuz, Freya and Odin... by these and other names are divine lovers known. I invite the Gods to come bless this union as we invoke the infernal names: Amon, Astaroth, Ishtar, Bast, Lilith, Pan, Asmodeus, Thoth. (the congregation may repeat each name as it is spoken)

[PRIEST takes up the red candle from the altar and raises it to the south.] We call upon the element of fire to come serve us, for we are Satan! Flame the passion of (bride's first name) and (groom's first name) and fill them with all consuming ardor and lust (?!?!) for each other!

[PRIEST takes up incense from the altar and raises it to the east.] We call upon the element of the air to come serve us, for we are Lucifer! Consciousness flows, one to the other, so this couple may share a mutual wisdom and unified vision.

(^ Belial.) [PRIEST takes up the crystal from the altar and raises it to the north.] We call upon the element of the earth to come serve us, for we are Belial! Your strength and constancy shall keep them together as long as they both shall live.

[PRIEST takes up a chalice filled with wine from the altar and raises it to the west.] We call upon the element of water to come serve us, for we are Leviathan! Grant (bride's name) and (groom's name) the qualities of serenity and patience and a love as deep as the ocean.

Hear me, you Watchers who lurk in the darkness. Be mindful of lovers such as these and provide them a bastion of solace and protection.

Bride and groom, up until this moment you have been separate in thought, word and action. As this cord binds together your hands, so do your lives become joined. [PRIEST takes up the cord from the altar and ties together GROOM'S left and BRIDE'S right hands.]

(^ Babalon.) (Bride's name), you bring the energy of BABALON; boundless, dark, intuitive, and soft. I bid you blend these energies with (groom's name) to make your lives together whole. Take this cup as a symbol of your love. [PRIEST takes the chalice from the altar and puts it in the bride's left hand.]

(Groom's name), you bring the energy of SATAN; expansive, bright, logical and hard. I bid you blend these energies with (bride's name) to make your lives together whole. Wield this blade as a symbol of your love. [PRIEST takes up short sword from the altar and places it in the GROOM'S right hand.]

GROOM: I pledge my blade, as I pledge my soul, ever to your service. Like this blade my love for you will be strong and enduring, so that our lives together will always be protected. Accept it, my beloved, and with it all that is mine becomes yours. Even if our paths should later diverge, yet I will always be your true friend, to love you and lend you aid and protection. By seed and root, by bud and stem, by leaf and flower and fruit, by life and love, in the name of Satan, I, (groom's name), take you, (bride's name), to my hand, my heart, and my spirit.

BRIDE: I pledge this chalice, as I pledge my soul, ever to your service. As from this cup, my love for you will pour forth so that our lives together will be nourished. Accept it, my beloved, and with it all that is mine also becomes yours. Even if our paths should later diverge, yet I will always be your true friend, to love you and lend you aid and protection. By seed and root, by bud and stem, by leaf and flower and fruit, by life and love, in the name of Babalon, I, (bride's name), take you, (groom's name), to my hand, my heart, and my spirit.

[GROOM dips the blade into the chalice.]

PRIEST: BABALON and SATAN, female and male, dark and light... neither has meaning without the other, but through their eternal interplay the universe is born.

[PRIEST takes blade and chalice and puts them on the altar.]

This bond I draw between you; when you are parted in mind or body, there will be a call in the core of you, one to the other, to which nothing and no one else will answer. By the secrets of the earth and water is this bond woven, unbreakable, irrevocable. By the law that created fire and wind is this bond written in your souls. [PRIEST unties the cord that binds BRIDE'S and GROOM'S hands and places it on the altar. PRIEST takes up couple's rings.]

Your vows have been made before your friends, the forces of Darkness and all the Gods of the Pit. These rings, like your vows, are without beginning or end. They are the physical representation of your promises to each other's spirits.

[BRIDE takes GROOM'S ring and places it on his finger. GROOM takes BRIDE'S ring and places it on her finger.]

Above you are the stars, below you are the stones. As time passes, remember - like a star should your love be constant, like the earth should your love be firm. Have no fear and let not the ways or words of the unenlightened give you unease, for Satan is with you, now and always! I now pronounce you husband and wife. The work of joy is done and yet begun!

[BRIDE and GROOM kiss.]

PRIEST: HAIL (bride's name)!

CONGREGATION: HAIL (bride's name)!

PRIEST: HAIL (groom's name)!

CONGREGATION: HAIL (groom's name)!

PRIEST: HAIL SATAN!

CONGREGATION: HAIL SATAN!

[DEACON (or BEST MAN) strikes the gong (or rings the bell) once. Candles are extinguished.]

END OF CEREMONY