Forever a Rocketeer

Today while on the bus to school, I had this uncanny feeling when I saw someone tweet about A Rocket To The Moon. Long story short, A Rocket To The Moon officially broke up today. I couldn't believe it. I didn't even know this day would come. Besides, they only released their Wild and Free album back in late March. I just couldn't believe it. I instantly had this empty feeling in my heart. They had been my ultimate favorite band since 2010. And now... I don't know what to feel anymore. It's like something really precious was taken away from me, yet I don't feel extreme sadness. I just feel empty. They have been a part of my life ever since the day I got to know them. I really wanna just scream it all out to someone or somewhere but instead I decided to just bottle it up in my heart until I have the chance to spill it all out on my blog tonight.

When I went to read what Nick had to say on his Twitter: he said to look out for an important announcement on their official website. When he posted that tweet I was asleep. The guys came up with this on their official website... God. How could this have happened.

The moment I reached school, I didn't talk to anyone. I just stood there in a daze while thinking about my ultimate favorite band in the whole wide world. Now that precious something was taken away from me. I was at a loss for words. I just wanted to go home and bawl my organs out. While I was still on the bus to school, I tweeted, "This isn't happening.". My friend asked me what I meant by that when I reached school. Suddenly I was flushed with all my emotions and I immediately shook my head and looked away. Tears almost welled up in my eyes but I held it in. I didn't want to show it to anyone.

Just now, when I was listening to their songs again, I really couldn't help it, so I broke down. You have no idea how much A Rocket To The Moon means to me. (Damn, I'm starting to cry again.) I never thought I would have to see this day coming but here it is, one of the worst days of my life, 10/5/2013. The day A Rocket To The Moon split up forever.

As sad as I can get, this was the guys' decisions. I do respect their decisions if this is what they really want for the best. But I'm really, really devastated that I can never get to see them, EVER, in my whole life. I was holding onto that measly possibility of hope of them coming to Singapore for a concert but now that little hope is crushed into a million tiny shards. Now I will never get to see them, EVER, in my whole freaking life.

Yesterday felt like the first day that I stumbled upon their song in the related videos on YouTube back in 2010. I remembered I was listening to I'll Be Your Sunset.

At first I really didn't think the song was that nice but I just kept on checking them out. Little did I know they turned out to be my ultimate favorite band in the whole wide world. I was continuously listening to their songs everyday since then. Whole day, even before I went to bed, I listened to them until I started to fall asleep. They were the main sources of my happiness, the main sources of my motivations and inspirations. I started to fall in love with the band more and more each day.

They were all I thought about each day, everyday. I sang their songs as though as it were my own concert every day in the shower. I hum their songs when I'm feeling happy, when I'm feeling down, and when I'm feeling mad. They were just that influential to me.

No matter what Nick, Halvo, Andrew, and Justin decides to do, I'll always, always, support them from the bottom of my heart. All the best in your futures and everything that you do. Just remember that there's this fan from Singapore who loves you guys with all her heart and will always support you guys no matter what.

Today's the last day which I will be buying A Rocket To The Moon's merchandise. I just ordered the Wild and Free album, a hoodie, and a t-shirt, in addition to my On Your Side album, the bracelet, and another t-shirt.

I'll always carry A Rocket To The Moon in my heart.

You and I, we, will always be young, wild, and free.

I love them too much to accept this so quickly. I need time. I really need time..